The Marriage Zone, huh?

Misogyny in various grim forms has been flying around a lot, lately. These various examples of overt sexism have been angering feminists of the world (male and female) like a swarm of disgusting – not to mention extremely annoying – mosquitos. Luckily, of course, every time they descend to cause irritation and misery, countless clever and enlightened commentators of all sorts come forward to call them out with aplomb. From Seth Macfarlane’s deeply offensive ‘We saw your boob’ debacle, to tales of sexual harassment by all manner of men in power, decent males of the world have been getting some seriously bad representation.

Well, guys and girls, if you’ve had enough of all this then read no further. Slightly tangential to the main theme of the blog, but still heavily featuring twentysomethings, I give you ‘The Marriage Zone’. See below for an astonishing example of backward ‘banter’ doing the rounds on Wall Street. It will no doubt be making its way onto an email chain near you, very soon.

The Marriage Zone – Analysis and Findings pdf

Have you read The Marriage Zone? In which case, continue. It only gets better here on out.

Boys! Camaaan, you’re better than this! Not all of you, clearly. But you’re really not doing your sex any favours here. Might I suggest you hire some better representation? Get a male Jennifer Lawrence, Ellen Degeneres or Caitlin Moran or whoever you think best shows off the most positive elements of your sex. Leave Seth and the creators of The Marriage Zone at home along with Cardinal Keith O’Brien.

There seems little point in explaining or raging against The Marriage Zone. (‘The Slut Zone’ of girls aged over 15 is, however, the exception to this; rage is absolutely required). Yes, looking at it again just made me vomit a little bit in my mouth. But it feels like a boring waste of time to point out all the many, many ways in which this is deeply offensive and full of utter wank. You can figure it out for yourselves and if you need pointers there are tonnes of people who will give you some tips as to why this is completely degrading.

It would be easy to become despondent over this. But ladies and all the decent males out there I say, don’t worry! Fret not! It’s important to point and call these things out but we needn’t let it distract us. Luckily I know so many men and boys who would not only find this offensive but would find it hard to believe that people waste their time putting it together, let alone believing it.

The vast majority of people will glance over The Marriage Zone in the way you might a supermarket receipt when all you’ve bought is loo roll and washing up liquid ‘Oh, yea, that boring old stuff, blah blah blah…bin.’

So let us not pay too much attention or spend hours fuming over it.  Because while we all go off and enjoy our day those who created it will receive a visit from some very angry and hardworking penis-shrinking elves (and, probably one day, the police).

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2 thoughts on “The Marriage Zone, huh?

  1. Wow, I can’t believe that exists. Well, I can believe it, but I wish I couldn’t. You’re so right, though; “The Marriage Zone” doesn’t even deserve our indignation. That’s just what its creators want.

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